Black Sabbath and Glue: A Cautionary Tale

So I read online that a good way to clean records is by using wood glue. You coat the record in it, and then when it dries you simply peel it off. In theory, the glue gets right into the grooves, and when you peel it off, it takes any dirt with it. Made sense to me, so I gave it a try.

In a momentary lapse of reason, I decided to use it on a record I had that was dirty but enjoyable, namely Black Sabbath Volume 4. In retrospect, I should have tested it on a Barry Manilow record or some other shitshingle, but alas, live and learn. I applied the glue, let it dry, and came back some time later. I discovered that I had a great deal of trouble trying to peel off the layer, for whatever reason. Perhaps there is a difference between wood glue and "carpenter's glue," which is what I used, or perhaps I didn't put a thick enough layer on (which I later read about). Whatever the case, it was difficult to remove, so I decided to wash it off with water.

BIG. MISTAKE.

The water removed most of the surface glue, but the stuff that was deep in the grooves was deeply entrenched and wouldn't go anywhere. I let it sit for a while, but no dice, and since I didn't want the label to be destroyed I took it out and shelved it for a while.

Fast forward to a couple of weeks later, when I was thinking about how to clean it up, and realized that if I put something on the label, some sort of clear glue, it might protect it. It won't look the best, but a dirty label is better than no label at all. I looked around for what to use, and found a bottle of rubber cement and some silicone aquarium sealant. Since I know the rubber cement dries clear and the silicone translucent, I went with the cement. I applied it to the label, and could still read it, which was a good sign. I then proceeded to soak the record in dish soap and warm water (not hot, that could warp the record). When I came back a while later, I found that it helped, but there was still some glue residue on the record. I then discovered that vinegar is good at breaking the seal of wood glue, and gave it a shot, soaking the record in vinegar, then scrubbing the hell out of it. Then I went to bed, leaving the record to dry.

I then came back to the record the next morning, and the vinegar seemed to do the trick. Most, though not all, of the glue disappeared. I'm not sure if what's left will ever go away, but I'm out of vinegar now so I decided to give it a rest. Much to my surprise though, the rubber cement peeled away from the label leaving no trace that it had ever been there.

The moral of the story is simply that if you want to try a new technique, always try it on something that doesn't matter if you can. Also, rubber cement works great in protecting record labels (that would be the label on the record, not the label distributing the record), but make sure the label is covered completely, and overlap it onto the vinyl itself and inside the hole in the middle to make sure no water gets underneath it.

Soundtracks and how important they really are

There's a lot of different ways to rate a soundtrack. If it's fitting, great, then it's at least adequate. If it's not fitting, but sounds good on its own, then it's at least fine musically. If it fits but is boring as a stand alone listen, then it's boring. Etc etc you get the idea. But a truly great soundtrack isn't just fitting and fun to listen to. It's more than the movie. A truly great soundtrack transcends the movie. It becomes so much more than background filler noise. A truly great soundtrack makes the entire thing work. A truly great soundtrack can create an entirely different emotional feel.

Take the American Beauty soundtrack. Without it, the movie is cliché, artsy bullshit. The paper bag scene would be pointless, and all the peace and quiet in the movie would be draggy. With the music, everything becomes actual art. The long scenes are magical and the bag scene is the most beautiful thing you've ever seen.

Better example, Halo. Don't start bitching, stay with me.

Halo is nothing but a generic shooter. Faceless human soldier VS hordes of evil aliens on a strange planet. This game has nothing going for it in the ways of creativity or story or whatever. However, and most people experienced this subconsciously, the incredibly modest and calm soundtrack turns the game from a generic fragfest into something much more substantial. The monk choir turns the main menu into something beautiful, and puts the player's mind at ease. But, more importantly, the music is always sad. Even the most epic of battle songs always have this hint of loss and sadness to them. This gives the player the feeling that even though he's kicking ass, it's all going to be for nothing. The war is almost lost, humanity is screwed. All throughout the game the music  is reminding you that there's a true sense of urgency towards what you're doing. You truly are mankind's last hope.

A good soundtrack doesn't sound like it was written for the movie/game.

A truly good soundtrack sounds like the movie/game was written around the music.

No, Virginia: Santa Claus and the Glorification of Lying

There is no Santa Claus

This is a harsh truth that many of us had to learn when we were kids. Do you remember when your parents finally stopped trying to convince you that a morbidly obese man in a magical sleigh would sneak into your house at night and leave you gifts? Santa Claus is a western tradition that goes back centuries, but the modern incarnation, that of a jolly fat man in a red suit, is an invention of Coca-Cola, and this image has permeated modern culture. Of course, even if he is based on a historical figure, he is no more real than Shakespeare's portrayal of Julius Caesar. However, this has not stopped modern adults from perpetuating the lie to their children. In fact, people have gone to great lengths to do so. Parents will leave half-eaten cookies and an empty glass of milk, as well as a note and presents signed “from Santa,” and of course by the time they are old enough to recognize the fact that Santa's handwriting bears a remarkable resemblance to mommy or daddy's, they are informed of the dupe. NORAD claims to track Santa with its radar, and even sends “honour guard” jet pilots to escort him on his journey. One can write letters to Santa and send them through the mail, and he will reply. Children can even go meet him at a shopping mall, and tell him what they want for Christmas.

This of course is all a farce, but to what end? One can simply chalk it up to “tradition” and leave it at that, but there must be another reason. It seems to me that the reason for this large web of lies and deceits is a way for people to get used to being lied to by society at large. Of course, we are lied to by our governments constantly, as well as our employers, our friends, our spouses, and any other figures in our lives. Perhaps Santa Claus is designed to present children with a massive lie, so that when the rest of the world lies to them it doesn't seem as Earth-shattering.

But is this right?

Should we be grooming our children to “get used to it,” or should we be working toward a world with fewer lies and deceits? Should we be breeding our children for “more of the same,” or should we try to create a better world for them?

Welcome to The 'Hell!

Hi everyone, Brad here. Welcome to The 'Hell's new blog! First, I'd like to give a bit of history about our fine little community:


It all started on a board way back in the day when a board called Anti-MTV was started. The board eventually expanded to include reviews and opinion pieces. Don't look for it now, it's not there anymore. It is significant, however, in that some of our oldest members came from that site, including Jose, better known as Megafury. When the site closed down, Jose moved on and founded the website known as MTVHell. Some members went with him, which prompted him to attach a forum to that site. MTVHell soon grew in its own right, however, many people contributing album reviews, opinion pieces, drawings, music and anything else, which attracted many new members, including the person writing this post, and most of the contributors to this blog. However, Megafury quickly grew tired of footing the bill for the site on his own (can you blame him?), and since no one else had any money, MTVHell closed its doors in 2006. The site, however, being hosted on a free message board service, survived, and the MTVHell community continued to thrive, although it rarely saw any new members. Some of us still had something to say, however, and since we still don't have any money, we decided to start a blog to express our opinions. However, MTVHell seemed cliche and juvenile at this point, and MTV is no longer a source of music in the first place, which left us in a conundrum as to what to name ourselves. We decided on "The 'Hell," in order to preserve a piece of our history while still moving forward. The forum still lives, and anyone is welcome to come by and have a chat. It's at http://mtvhell.myfastforum.org, and has the distinction of being one of the only forums on the internet that is still active and is not being flooded with spambots. Stop by and say hi!